Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Actual Reports of Speaking One's Mind in Adidam

After my last post slamming the Basket of Tolerance Quote of the Day website for not being straight up about either the Basket of Tolerance or its relationship to Adi Da, I did a little searching among Adidam-related blogs and found Adi Da Acausal, which is at least an honest and straightforward one in which the writer "says what's on his mind". It's written by a devotee who unfortunately won't give out his real name. Not sure why that seems to be the case with these devotees.

In any case, at least the author of this site puts his devotion to Adi Da up front and doesn't try to hide it behind some facade of calculated objectivity. He's a true believer, and makes no bones about it, and tries to explain himself and his relationship to Adi Da as best he can. One can argue with the content and its rationale, but at least both reader and blogger know what they are talking about. There's something refreshing about that, coming from Adidam, and perhaps its a sign that following Adi Da's death there's going to be some loosening of the stranglehold the institutional people have had on ordinary devotee's ability to speak their minds in public.

Of course, perhaps even this author is very reluctant to talk about some of the more controversial, personal aspects of Adi Da's teaching, relationship to devotees, abusive behavior, sex, money, exploitation, etc. And perhaps the anonymity of the blog is in part designed to shield his identity not just from the public, but from internal Adidam watchdogs as well. Or maybe he's just shy. But one does find some refreshing candor in his posts, including Adidam as a Mountain-Yet To Be Climbed, in which he makes the following observation:

Often I feel this about Adidam–meaning the practice and its ultimate outcome–It stands like an unclimbed peak, unchartered, unknown and pathless. It can be talked about, speculated on but no one has managed by Grace or effort to get passed the lower slopes
Adi Da Samraj particulary in His later years, closed all loop holes that may have allowed an egoic foothold here or there, so on first inspection it looks like a sheer climb, an ice chasm, with nowhere to start and no summit visible from the ground, a conundrum of sorts
I have looked at it from many angles and speculated on a possible approach that would allow a means to make a start, to get a foot hold, even a cleft of rock to pivot upon, each time I thought I may be on to something, the grip has given way upon testing and shown itself not to be workable.
Even now I think it may be possible, a new approach that will meet all the criteria and yet allow a passage… harder than passing through the eye of a needle, perhaps. One thing is for sure no “ego” can get even a foothold here.

A couple of things here. Although it's true that no one in Adidam has gotten past the base of this mountain, it's not as if there is no detailed “map” of how one is supposed to climb the mountain. The whole detailed teaching of Adi Da, written in thousands and thousands of pages, with all its instructions, stages, and so forth, is the map. The “path” is not pathless. It's just untraveled beyond the base. For that reason, however, we can't tell if the map is a good one, an accurate one, or just an error-filled mock-up that is not as useful as advertised. For that matter, it's hard to say that even his “base” instructions are good ones, or that they are a good preparation for climbing the mountain. It's certainly possible that no one has climbed this mountain because the preparation one gets at the base is inadequate or points people in wrong directions. I'd say that's the conclusion I came to, and why I left. But others obviously think differently, and its good to hear someone in Adidam at least describing his process of figuring these matters out.

For that reason I'd like to give at least qualified praise to this fellow. He's at least trying to be relatively transparent about his own experience with the Adidam teachings. Not everything he says makes sense or adds up, but at least he's putting it out there for others to examine. And that helps people grow, so it's important to encourage that. He even tries to grapple with some of the contradictions in Adi Da's teachings, such as the problem of “exclusivity”. In his post Q:Is Adi Da Teaching Exclusivity-One Way or Path to God, he at first tries to describe Adidam as a non-exclusive path because:

Adidam (which can mean the institution itself, and the practice of Adidam) is based on a most radical assumption- that all beings already are even now completely one with Real God, clearly then no one is ever separated from Real God or can ever be damned or denied that same condition so in that sense there can be no exclusive means or path to the Divine including any religious means because none are necessary, since the condition sought can never be attained or to put it another way “can never be lost or found ” or to put it even more realistically, all traditional paths and religious means are doomed to fail in there quest for Ultimate Realization, that is not to dispute all the traditional states of realization, samadhi or enlightenment, they certainly are attainable, that is not doubted and there have always been and will always remain great and lesser Realizers of these most honorable traditions (Including Christianity, Judaism, Sufism, Hinduism, Buddhism and all the other major and minor genuine traditions)

Quite a run-on sentence, but the sentiment is clear. And yet, it sounds pretty exclusive still, even if trying to be tolerant and appreciative of those outside the club, so to speak. But even he seems to sense this – one of the results of honestly speaking your mind is that you can't help reflecting on some of the crap that comes out - so at one point he just gives up trying to defend Adidam's non-exclusive status and reverses himself:

...having said all of that, there is only One means to the Divine Realization and the Absolute Freedom that is the Seventh Stage Realization of Reality Itself or Real God and that is through the means of Avatar Adi Da Samraj and His Agency: Adidam. So yes it is “exclusive” in that sense and there is no use saying it is otherwise. Adi Da Samraj makes it abundantly clear, overwhelmingly clear that this is exactly the case. An example is the constant use of the “Only-By-Me-Given”. It is constant and the devotee or regular reader of Adi Da’s Work may get a little immune to it, but it remains a blunt reminder for anyone who starts getting too universalistic, egalitarian and idealistic about the process (as is my own tendency).
As with many others my own tendency is to dilute that aspect of Adidam, in my own case because it smacks so much of the hideous “One Way” messages of Christianity and many other (if not all) exoteric religions. To date I have tended to deny this reality of Adidam and be almost an apologist for its possibility, but I clearly note this is an internal conflict of mine, and many others have no problem with it all, and are very clear on the matter as is Avatar Adi Da.

I have to agree that this is what Adi Da taught, and even the writer's self-aware reluctance to fully accept it can't change that. At least the fellow is self-aware of the contradiction between his own sense for spiritual reality, and the claims of Adi Da to this kind of exclusive “all must go through me” sovereign superiority to all other paths. There's at least a hint of a real conscience here, not yet drummed into line by the demands for full belief. The question remains, however: if this fellow has only stayed at the base of the mountain, how does he know that this is true at the higher and ultimate levels of the mountain? Yes, Da says it's true, but how can it be anything but sheer belief if one hasn't actually been there and done it? Elsewhere he tries to describe Adidam as a path that eschews belief, but he doesn't say how his faith in Adidam as the One true path to Divine Realization is anything but that. Well, at least he's struggling with such issues, which is a good thing.

The blogger behind this site doesn't appear to be a newbie to Adidam – he says he came across the teachings in the 1970s – but it's not clear how long he's been a practicing student. He seems fairly happy being a devotee, and not embarrassed by it, or hiding it, which is good all the way around. If I was harsh on the previous BoT website, it was because it had none of these virtues, not because it was championing Adi Da. In fact, I was harsh on it precisely because it didn't champion Adi Da, but tried to create some devious little entrapment route that not minimized it's author's involvement with Adidam, but even minimized any reference to Da's work with the BoT and what it means. At a certain level I could care less whether someone is a devotee of Da's or not, as long as they are earnest in their practice and don't willfully deceive others. People can practice some form of genuine spirituality in almost any form or tradition or path, as long as their intentions (and actions) are honest and straight. It's possible to do this in Adidam, of course. It may be even easier now that Adi Da isn't around anymore to get in the way of the honest man's path. At least I reserve some small hope there for people like this blogger.


Evelyn Disk said...

Mr. Yogi, your wisdom and humor shine through as always in this post. That being the case, there is probably no way in hell that you would ever fall for the trap that idiot Raymond fell for would you?

You hinted of My Identity in earlier posts - am I THAT One?


Toodle-oo for now, keep up the excellent work!

Evelyn Disk said...

Dear Mr. (Supposedly) Broken Yogi:

Apparently you really ARE broken if you do not show the respect for somebody you have been devoted to for years and years (thinking it was that OTHER guy)!

Jeezus, what a hard headed Yogi you are but we find no defects or broken parts here at the shop - if you have any more symptoms of such "breakage", just:


Broken Yogi said...


I appreciate interesting company, regardless of its nature, but don't you think you ought to get a close shave and a haircut before coming over? I know a good barber - expensive as all hell, but worth the price. Here in the land of the broken, we appreciate the importance of keeping up appearances.

Evelyn Disk said...

Anonymous said...

Broken yogi. I have studied Adi Da's teaching since 1982 while practicing other Masters sadhanas. Adi Da's teachings are the most complete and clear of all as he says. In late 1997 while studying the 2nd edition of The Dawn Horse Testiment, I was sooo riveted to it and absorbed in it and I was entered so profoundly by Adi Da's Ruchira Shakti and it was soooo Bright, beautiful and amazingly opening and powerful that I became completely devoted to him and absorbed in him. It was wayyyyy more powerful and beautiful then the Parashakti and Kundalini Shakti ! It was emotionally difficult to switch from my Sat Guru at that time to Adi Da because I had been so devoted to him for over 6 years. But I silently thanked him many times and told him he would always be my friend and I was able after a few months to switch to Adi Da as my principle Sat Guru. Anyway, I was so excited about the prospect of being initiated into Adidam and doing the full practice and a few months later called one of the Adidam centers to arrange for that. I talked with the teacher for a while and then he asked me if I was working. At the time I had some serious medical issues and wasnt working but I never got to explain about the medical issues because right after I said no, the teacher soooo bombastically, rudely and arrogantly dismissed me and told me to call back after I had a job ! What an asshole ! It was sooo shocking, it just shot me out into the universe like a missile launcher away from Adidam and I was soooo turned off I didnt call them back for many years even though I started working about 5 months later ! So I know from direct experience what I think many people have been pissed off and disgusted about. One ex member said to me that she left because they were soooo dogmatic ! Well I sure experienced that ! Like a BOMB ! ! ! Theres more to the story but I dont want to go into it all right now on here. One thing I want to say is that I dont blame any of it on Adi Da. A master should never be blamed for what any devotees do ! I stayed with Adi Da after that, completely devoted to him and meditating on him and studying his teaching virtually every day.
Another thing is this. Its up to you to understand the 7 stages of human growth and developement and the philisophys, psychologys, cosmologys, metaphisics, world views, Samadhis, Masters, teachings, practices, etc of each of the 7 stages. Adi Da gas never said anything so stupid as He is the only way ! What he does say is that He is the only 7th stage Sat Guru and therefore the only way to the seventh stage Samadhi. This I KNOW from my own experience, intuition and insight and dont merely believe ! But that is up to you to find out for yourself, NOT to believe or disbelieve ! Also I should say that I have done a very intensive study of the Great Tradition on all levels since 1977 as well as having practiced with several Siddha Masters since 1977.
Another thing I would like to say is this. You are spewing your own internal conflicts and negativity and shit onto Adi Da and then blaming him for your shit ! Im a very empathic intuitive person and as im writing this im feeling the disgustingness of the negativity and filth that are inside your bodymind and its sickening, you have demons in you and its very creepy so im going to have to get off here now ! I highly suggest you grow up and stop being such a negatively critical, judgemental, arrogant person and go to a Siddha Master, be initiated, and do the sadhana constantly with lots of retreats as well as doing lots of Ayurveda ! Also Ammachi's pujas can help, though the Yoga Sadhana is by far the most important and effective ! Good luck and peace !